It’s hard to believe it’s been almost a year since Sitch, Pauly D, Vinnie, JWOWW & Snooki fist-pumped their way into our hearts.* It feels like just yesterday that the GTL lifestyle revolutionized the way lazy college students spend their Saturdays. It’s not hard to understand why JS is a cultural phenomenon. Snooki and company may have what some deem personality flaws (seriously, Sitch–you were a major dick last week), but they are infinitely entertaining.
I’m an Anglo girl from the South. I went to Florida for beaches. I have never been to the Jersey Shore, and until last December my knowledge of it consisted solely of what I learned watching MTV in 1998 when they broadcasted from Seaside Heights all summer. New Jersey exists to me as a state with unfortunate traffic that you have to drive through on your way to New York.** Jersey Shore, to me, is like watching the greatest National Geographic special of our time.
The Jersey Shore cast is the epitome of Famous for Bad Reasons. They fight, they get arrested for public intoxication, the guys have a terrible attitude towards women (Dear Sitch, you have great abs but your face and STD-status still make you Captain Grenade), they all smush each other. But they are really fucking fun to watch. If there was a recent TV moment that made me laugh harder than Sitch calling Angelina a “dirty little hamster” after finding her used pad on the floor, I can’t think of it.
And they’re real. Despite the newfound fame and riches, Snooks really does want a guido gorilla juicehead to love, and she’s not afraid to show it. Pauly does not care if you know it takes him 30 minutes to make his hair perfectly immobile. Even Sitch, in all his misogynistic glory, is at least upfront about the fact that he’s just trying to get it in. So we at FFBR will continue to watch, to hail Queen Snooki, to love JWOWW for always sticking up for her friends, to secretly want to hook up with Vinnie. As Sitch so often says on Twitter, if hating is your occupation we have a full time job for you.
Plus: they provide us with some of the greatest .gifs on the internet. That’s priceless.
*Others are supposedly on this show, but they are disgusting human beings and will not be mentioned. I fast forward through any scene involving a Sam/Ronnie argument. “I’m done” with all their shit.
**Except for that one night my sister’s boyfriend took me to a club by Rutgers, where I saw several real-life Situations and was scarred for life.