The Gemini on Fictional Characters Who Sadly Remain Fictional

In honor of the upcoming Valentine’s Day “holiday” we here at FFBR decided to do what we do best: objectify fictional male characters. With that said, here is my list of Five Male Television Characters Who Should Exist In Real Life Because They Are All Infinitely Better Than The Real Men in Our Nation’s Capitol.*

5. Jim Halpert, The Office


4. Cary Agos, The Good Wife

–Looks great running around the park
–Lawyer ($$$)
–Once solved a case while on mushrooms

–Not that great of a lawyer (lost the Associate competition to Alicia; loses his case almost every week)
–Has a hard time letting go of grudges

3. Grayson Ellis, Cougar Town

He gets possessive over his space, drinks too much wine, and is almost entirely incapable of talking about his ~feelings~ in relationships. Some people may call these turn-offs. These people and I would not last in a relationship, as Grayson is basically myself in male form.

2. Damon Salvatore, The Vampire Diaries

Sometimes you just need a murderous psychopath with oddly-twitchy eyebrows and a tendency for mind control. If you’re not into that, there’s always his relatively-sane (and much more boring) brother Stefan.

1. The men of Friday Night Lights
I’m not saying that I spent the majority of my weekend catching up on season 5 of FNL before this week’s series finale, but I am saying that I had a great weekend doing whatever it was that I did. Just look at these GQMFs:

Tim Riggins

Luke Cafferty

Smash Williams

Coach Taylor
Seriously, Tostitos. Brilliant move having him do the voiceovers for your new commercials. Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t stop buying chips.

Matt Saracen
Ah, the fictional love of my TV life. If I had spent my weekend watching FNL, I might have let out an audible squeal when he suddenly appeared towards the end of the season. And I may have teared up a little when he surprised his Grandma in Dillon with a Christmas tree because 1) I am 99% sure FNL has some sort of sadistic need to make everyone cry at least twice per episode and 2) there is no relationship on TV that’s more adorable than Matt and his Grandma.

Aim high, ladies!
–The Gemini**

*I should specify that this list is only for TV shows still on the air. Otherwise, Chandler Bing would obviously be number one.

**The Libra would like to add that Damon is number one on her list.


About Famous For Bad Reasons

Pop Culture and Feelings, brought to you by two people with too much regard for the former and no regard for the latter.
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10 Responses to The Gemini on Fictional Characters Who Sadly Remain Fictional

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention The Gemini on Fictional Characters Who Sadly Remain Fictional | --

  2. Cait says:

    Dude…can I get a spoiler alert? I’m only on season 1 episode 20 of The Good Wife. And it’s rockin’. As is Matt Czuchry. Yum.

  3. Emily says:

    i blame FNL for the demise of my last relationship. why can’t i live in the fictional world of dillon, texas? i’ll take coach and tim riggins, please.

  4. Kendralula says:

    I would like to point out that Kyle Chandler has been my TV soul mate since Early Edition.

    Even at a young age I knew a damn sexy man when I saw one.


    • The Gemini has been trying to get me to watch Friday Night Lights for weeks; I just haven’t had time yet because I accidentally started watching Lost. However, knowing Kyle Chandler is in it helps speed up the process; I used to watch Early Edition just because he was dreamy.

      –The Libra

  5. Bower Power says:

    “There is no relationship on TV that’s more adorable than Matt and his Grandma. ”


    I had to take a break from Friday Night Lights for the same reason I needed a break from Mad Men: My tear ducts aren’t used to that much action.

  6. Pingback: The Gemini’s Near-Death Experience, Kind Of |

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